humor, motherhood, Say what.

Say WHAT?!

Sick burn, four-year old.

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humor, motherhood, Parent Life

Full Monty Moana (A show-and-tell cautionary tale)

  Remember naked Moana from yesterday? I'd be failing you if I didn't tell you the whole naked Moana story. But first, some background.  It turns out that every Friday is show-and-tell day in my 4-year-old's preschool room. I didn't know and I was intrigued. What exactly had my kid bringing to class show-and-tell these… Continue reading Full Monty Moana (A show-and-tell cautionary tale)

4am kid convos, featured, humor, motherhood, Parent Life

“I am the cheese monster!”

4:02 a.m. Child climbs into bed with me. Husband is blissfully asleep in guest bed "getting over a the stomach flu." Please, you know he is psychic and predicted this event transpiring. 4 y.o.: "It is dark!" Me: "Yes Z, it is the middle of the night." 4yo: "I AM THE CHEESE MONSTER!" Me: perplexed. Laughs. [READ MORE]

humor, motherhood, Seasons and Celebrations

I don’t like onions! I make them cry!

That was the three-year-old in response to stuffing being placed on her thanksgiving plate. The nerve! You don't even want to hear what she said about the celery. (She did however find Redi-whip to be quite to her liking. She ran around the house with it clutched in her hands and squealing. It took three… Continue reading I don’t like onions! I make them cry!

humor, motherhood

Three more reasons to smile – and one reason to frown

Don't worry - the reason to frown will also make you laugh. Stick with me. three (more) reasons to smile: 1. the Canadians are back! the Canadians are back! Our Canadians (that's what we call them) who live down the street have returned from Montreal. They have a huge, sweet brown dog named Buddy. They… Continue reading Three more reasons to smile – and one reason to frown

4am kid convos, humor, motherhood, Mothers & Motherless Daughters

Who Killed JR? His toddler who refused to sleep!

Flashback to 1983. My parents are watching Dallas in the basement with their friends. I'm at the top of the stairs, trying not to squeak the steps, hunched in a nightgown with my knees pulled tight. Of course my mom sees me and yep, she is upset. Despite her frustration she lets me sit on the floor and join them in watching the number one show of 1983. My mom had to do this a lot--put up with a kid who was awake until all hours of the night. Usually it was just the two of us. She'd let me watch Love Boat on the tiny black and white TV in our kitchen while she made popcorn. Initially she would be exasperated (Of COURSE she was, adult Sarah gets it now!) but she always softened and lovingly let me join her in her late night routine. Let me write it out right here in case my prayers haven't reached my mother: MOM I AM SO SORRY FOR WHAT I PUT YOU THROUGH. MOM HOW DID YOU DO IT. MOM YOU POOR WOMAN YOU NEVER. GOT. A. BREAK! Why the sudden mea culpas? [Read More]

motherhood

The time I tried to lure my child to sleep with ambient music

I read about some music that has been proven by science to be the most relaxing and I thought, a HA! WE WILL TRY THIS. So while my husband was trying to get the kid to sleep I listened to it to try it out. I nearly fell asleep. Oh this was good. When it was (inevitably) my turn to take over trying to get this child to go the f to sleep, I brought my handy music playlist. This is a recap of how it went down...