Dear Former Self,
We need to talk.
I am not sure how to break this to you. Like removing a band-aid, it is probably best to do this quickly. Not beat around the bush.
When your daughter turns three, she requests a Frozen-themed cake and wears a princess dress to her party.
Are you ok? Do you need to sit down? Can I get you a glass of water?
First things first: What is Frozen you ask? ONLY THE BEST DISNEY MOVIE EVER. (I should explain: most parents in the future disagree with you on that point. Just an FYI.)
No, seriously. It is a Disney movie that doesn’t entirely suck. It is a story about true love…BETWEEN SISTERS! #didn’tseethatonecoming. (Bonus: your amazing sister even makes a stunning cake featuring the movie’s protagonists. #Sistersforever.)
I digress. Back to the princess thing.
First of all, do not fret. Your future self has not abandoned all her feminist principles. Not by a long shot.
Here is the thing: in the future, you chill out and learn to trust your child. You understand that she isn’t fragile and will not break at the site of a Disney princess.
You find balance.
Yes, your kid watches Frozen, but she also watches Bob the Builder, Curious George, and Masha and the Bear. (That last one? Oh just a quirky Russian cartoon about a girl and her anthropomorphic bear friend. You will dig it.)
Here’s the other thing: the more your get into this parenting gig, the more you learn that you can’t make every little thing about YOU. You learn to let your child be who they are. This means that sometimes you have to release your preconceived visions of how you think things should be.
Like, letting your child wear nothing but a diaper while opening Christmas presents, despite the fact that she is essentially naked in all the photos. She hates clothes (she is a toddler) and it just is not worth the battle. You learn to roll with it.
Why, you could even say you learn to Let it go! (Ha! This will be a funny joke in the future, trust me.)
Take heart. She initially wanted a dinosaur cake for her birthday. She still loves dinosaurs, too. In fact, at daycare one day, the teacher jokingly called her “princess z.” and she scowled back, “I am NOT a princess. I am a dinosaur! I am a T-REX!”
So relax. It’s all good.
Your Future Self
P.S. Girlfriend, invest in some good under-eye concealer. You’re going to need it.